Are you overtrained?

I know I am. Or rather, I’ve finished about eight weeks of feeling great on the bike and now the peak has passed. To continue, experience tells me, will result in much badness filled with unhappiness and sadness and etc.

What are the symptoms of overtraining? You certainly don’t need to look here, as it is well covered by numerous other #fakesports publications.

  1. Bodybuilding has you covered!
  2. Men’s fitness has you covered!
  3. Wikipedia has you covered!
  4. Bicycling has you covered!
  5. Cycling Weekly has you covered!
  6. Joe Friel has you covered!
  7. Cycling Tips has you covered!
  8. Pez Cycling has you covered!
  9. GCN has you covered!
  10. And thank goodness, Semi-Pro Cycling has you covered!

Reading through all these tips and clickbait and insurance offers for cyclists who ride more than 50 miles a week, you may well get overtrained from reading about overtraining.

However, Cycling in the South Bay can save you from all those other articles with a quick, ad-free list. Here’s how you know you’ve fallen into the hole.

  1. The little voice inside your head (or all fifty of them) shrieks “Fuck you!” when people harass and disturb you by saying things like “Good morning!”
  2. You glare at your bicycle.
  3. Every non-cycling thing you’ve ever done in your life and given up on seems incredibly fascinating.
  4. Amazon. For hours.
  5. Your idea of social time with friends is staying in bed, alone.
  6. Astonishing soreness in your legs when you attempt major physical efforts, such as standing.
  7. The last ride you did you felt invincible. For ten minutes. After that, you felt like you look.
  8. Food appears to be a kind of poison.
  9. Ordinarily stupid things like the Giro and the Tour seem like crimes against intellectual humanity.
  10. If you had to choose between doing another interval and being strapped to a Nazi fallbeil, it would be the easiest choice you ever made.

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5 thoughts on “Are you overtrained?”

  1. Maybe the only thing worse is if you get that unnerving feeling in a really long, hard race (e.g. the BRW, etc.) that you haven’t done the prep, and you’ve written a check your ass can’t cash.

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