Here is some shit I am real unthankful for.
- The Bike Hovel’s ditching of Baby Seal’s awesome weekly defamatory rag in favor of a generic “buy our crap” spamletter. Yeah, I unsuscribed asap because I don’t need any more “buy our crap” spam. Boring and timid may win the race but actually, it doesn’t.
- Prepared turkey dinners with all the trimmings for sale at Von’s. Why not just admit you hate your family, all you plan to do is get hammered, you don’t know how to cook, and let’s all just get In-N-Out? Fukkkkkk.
- Green Friday sales events. I am not buying your shit. Ever.
- Mealy-mouthed “holiday season” shit. Too bad you don’t have the balls to say “WE ARE SELLING THIS SHIT FOR THE BABY JESUS AND THE CHILD MOLESTER IN THE RED SUIT.” ‘Cuz if you aren’t proud of your invisible friend, I sure am not gonna be suckered into your “seasons greetings” festival. Bring on the druid goat sacrifice, yo.
- Slave labor. Cannot stand seeing people work when the rich folks are in Fiji or angsting over their plantation on Hawai’i that they can’t find the perfect architect for.
Okay. That’s it. Pretty much thankful for everything else.
Celebrate every day and let the poor turkeys be. Click here and select the “subscribe” link in the upper right-hand corner. Thank you!