Wanky boycott!

I read that a white supremacist who is throwing a white supremacist fundraiser for the white supremacist president of the United States recently got boycotted because he owns shares in businesses where few of the customers are white supremacists, and the customers who are not white supremacists didn’t want to spend their money any more on a company that supports white supremacy.

Now a couple of things.

First, one of the companies being boycotted is Soul Cycle. If you’ve never heard of them it is because you are a cyclist. Soul Cycle does something called “spinning,” where you can, or rather you must, oxymoronically, ride your bike indoors. I went to their web site and couldn’t find any cycling on it anywhere, although there was a bunch of PG porn, i.e. sweaty hot people barely clad.

Second, the white supremacist who sits on Soul Cycle’s board and is the object of the boycott has no fucking idea how to tie a necktie. Neither does the White Supremacist in Chief.

Billions of dollars, zero tie-tying skilz.

The sine qua non for making your necktie look like it was tied by a gentleman instead of a baboon is the “dimple.” A necktie without a dimple is like a TT bike without a front wheel. Looks stupid, doesn’t work. And no, that gash off to the right of the WSIC’s tie is not a dimple.

Sartorial considerations aside, there’s a third issue with the billionaire white supremacist and his Trumpy fundraiser. Ross desperately needs a workout at Soul Cycle, Equinox (another fitness club he owns), or better yet, on the Thursday morning Flog that leaves from Malaga Cove. Dude looks terribly unfit and like he would benefit from a beating on the bike, if only to wipe that smug little racist bullshit grin off his sappy face.

But I know you’re wondering whether boycotts really work? Do they?

Like any good scientific answer, the answer is “It depends.”

Take the Wanky Boycott, for example. This is ongoing, and here’s how it works.

Someone comes across the Wanky blog and blows coffee/snot all over the keyboard. “That dude is hilarious!” they say. “That dude tells it like it is!” they say. “Go get ’em, Wanky!” they say. So they sign up for the $2.99 subscription, which is actually more expensive than the New York Times.

The Wanky subscriber goes happily along, getting his occasional blog to help him through the morning stool, when suddenly a very disturbing blog post appears, usually something like this, which results in this screaming ass-rash email threatening dire financial consequences:

So what is your point today Seth? People shouldn’t do charity rides for organizations such as JDRF? Why are you attempting to discourage people from participating in events that serve as fund raisers? Organizations use these events to help offset fewer charitable donations because of the tax revision starting this year. Why are you not doing the opposite and encouraging riders to participate in these events so funds can be raised to help find cures for diseases such as Type 1 Diabetes? Funds raised by JDRF in their rides help fund research and financial support, I think you should get your head out of your ass on this. I don’t get it, Did you not get enough swag from some charitable ride organization, did some wanker piss you off through doing a fund raising ride and boasted about it? I don’t get it. And yes I’m pissed. Do you prick your fingers multiple times per day to test your blood sugar? Do you receive insulin through a pump attached to your body? Do you wear a continuous glucose monitor to help ensure your blood sugar is neither too high or too low? Do you spend hundreds of dollars per year on insulin, test strips, monitors, and doctor appointments, because there is not a cure yet? So yeah, if some wanker gets to boast about the ride they did, but collects a few thousand dollars in donations, then that is good.

This kind of ass-rash usually results in an even bigger dose of ass-rash because I always take the time to respond to idiots.

Hi, Pudsy

I totally disagree. The only way that treatment for serious diseases comes about is through research that costs billions. For cancer/diabetes, hundreds of billions.

The only mechanism for that is federal funding for research grant funding through NIH et al. Anyone who wants these problems addressed should be advocating higher taxes and supporting AAS as the government slashes funding, not riding their stupid fucking bike to raise $1000 to make someone feel good.

What’s worse, people who donate think they have made a change. Remember Lance and cancer “awareness”? Millions pissed away.

You are wrong, people should not be encouraged/congratulated for harming research as they crow about themselves on Strava. The only solution is higher taxes and earmarks for general and targeted scientific research. The “I’m curing cancer” stuff is bullshit, a lie, and I’m tired of all the phony spam.

It’s as if I pointed out that “healing quartz stones” was a joke and you accused me of hating your kids.

But there’s more!

Tax deductions for charities are also a scam, diverting tax dollars so some spoiled rich white braggart can go on a beautiful bike vacation.

If you want to discuss in person I’m up for it anytime. Conversations are harder, but usually more rewarding, than emails.

Seth

Naturally, idiots hate it when you actually respond to them, so they hit you where they know it hurts most, that is, smack in the middle of your $2.99. See Pudsy’s well-thought out reply regarding heads and rectums.

I understand what you are saying. We are so far from that happening though. So I still think you got your head up your ass. I am thinking of cancelling my subscription as well. Just to be upfront, I stopped reading your blog, the day after the charity ride tirade. So I have canceled my subscription and payment for it.

In other words, “I will continue to read your blog and love it but no longer am going to pay for it.” This is eerily similar to the John Candy Trump dude who NEVER reads my blog and boycotts it religiously, exceptions being made for posts that go live on days of the week that end in “day.”

But back to the Wanky boycott. Does it work?

HELL YES IT WORKS. The best way to silence people with differing opinions is by making them starve to fucking death. You can’t blog when you are dead. Not well, anyway.

Ever since that dude canceled his subscription and John Candy quit reading, I have gone bankrupt(er), stopped blogging, and begun keeping a low profile. For example, I quit riding fast on the NPR, quit not wearing a helmet (lost a horse dentist subscriber over that one), and no longer say “fuck.”

But what about Stephen Ross and Soul Cycle/Equinox? Will that boycott work, too?

I’m not sure. White supremacy is what made America great and what is making it great again. But if the people who support white supremacy have to take a hit in the wallet, even if it’s only the equivalent of $2.99, well, it’s worth it. I’d cancel my gym membership, too. If I had one.

END


10 thoughts on “Wanky boycott!”

  1. Soulless Cycle

    I’m not so sure the Wanky boycott will work. But…the other Soul Cycle/Equinox boycott is already working. It is highlighting that so called “liberal” companies are not so liberal or accepting. The CEO’s that portray themselves as progressive and for the people are just flat out lying to you and maybe even themselves. Yes, Tim Cook and Jeff Besos are good at two things…Making money and making people believe that they are looking out for the greater good of society.

    1. The Wanky Boycott has already reduced me from a once-proud defender of free speech to a miserly consumer of canned beans and cornbread. I will never again say or write “fuck.” The corporate giants that poop on us deserve to have a bit of it smeared in their breakfast cereal every once in a while, and it seems like that’s what the boycotts are doing. Of course the people who truly feel the brunt of the pain are the trainers and workers who will shortly, if they don’t already, become what is euphemistically known as “in between jobs.”

  2. I’m pretty sure that wasn’t the post that lost you the most subscribers…

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