Union Cycliste International, the world’s governing body for the sport of Cycling (men) and for the sport of WDGAF (women), announced new dates for Cycling’s biggest events and indefinite postponement for WDGAF events.
Cycling in the South Bay caught up with UCI boss Yves-Baptiste le Chauviniste at his favorite strip club to discuss these changes.
CitSB: Big changes?
Yves-Baptiste: Oui, oui. Très big.
CitSB: How so?
YB: We must move Le Tour until August; incroyable.
CitSB: Très choque-ing. What will happen to the women’s races?
CitSB: The women.
YB: Ah, oui, oui. Cherchez les femmes!
CitSB: Non, non. The races for the women. What happens to those?
YB: Les quoi?
CitSB: Pour example, La Course, a race pour les femmes.
YB: (laughs) Les femmes are ici, cher ami.
CitSB: Oui, but what about the women’s races? When will they be rescheduled?
YB: Les chicky-chick races? Je ne sais pas.
CitSB: If you don’t know, who does?
YB: The chicky-chicks will get to do their little play race sometime, don’t worry, cher ami.
CitSB: How can the world governing body simply blow off the needs of women racers?
CitSB: How can you blow them off?
YB: (smiles) Ah, le blow job? Oui, oui, one can obtain it here.
CitSB: Not, not blow job. Blow off.
YB: We give the chicky-chicks some play dates, but with the virus … (shrugs). C’est la vie.
CitSB: So what happens when all of these women are thrown out of work because you won’t calendar their races?
YB: I am not sure, but you know, here at this establishment …
YB: One is always hiring.
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